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Glimmers: Tiny Moments of Safety That Calm Your Nervous System


A woman on her balcony reading, sipping tea, and enjoying flowers and sunshine during her morning routine.

In our fast-paced world, it's easy to overlook the small moments that bring us peace and joy. Yet, these fleeting experiences—known as "glimmers"—hold the power to regulate our nervous system and enhance our well-being. Coined by trauma therapist Deb Dana in her 2018 book Polyvagal Theory in Therapy, glimmers are the opposite of triggers: subtle cues that signal safety and connection to our body and mind.


🌟 What Are Glimmers?

Glimmers are brief, positive moments that evoke feelings of joy, calm, or connection. Unlike triggers, which activate the body's stress response, glimmers engage the parasympathetic nervous system, promoting relaxation and emotional regulation. These micro-moments can be as simple as:


  • Feeling the warmth of sunlight on your skin

  • Hearing a favorite song on the radio

  • Receiving a genuine smile from a stranger

  • Sipping a comforting cup of tea

  • Noticing the scent of fresh flowers


By tuning into these experiences, we can cultivate a sense of safety and presence in our daily lives.


⚖️ Glimmers vs. Triggers: Understanding the Difference

While triggers activate the body's fight-or-flight response, glimmers promote a state of calm and connection. Here's a comparison:

Aspect

Triggers

Glimmers

Effect on Nervous System

Activates stress response (fight/flight)

Activates relaxation response

Emotional Impact

Leads to dysregulation and overwhelm

Fosters calm and emotional balance

Social Connection

May cause withdrawal or isolation

Encourages openness and connection

Physical Sensations

Tension, rapid heartbeat, shallow breathing

Relaxed muscles, deep breathing


Recognizing and differentiating these cues can empower us to navigate our emotional landscapes more effectively.


🧠 The Science Behind Glimmers

Glimmers are rooted in Polyvagal Theory, developed by Dr. Stephen Porges. This theory explains how our autonomic nervous system detects cues of safety or danger through a process called neuroception. When we encounter glimmers, our body releases calming hormones like oxytocin and serotonin, counteracting the stress response triggered by trauma. Over time, accumulating glimmers can build nervous system resilience, enhancing our ability to cope with stress.


🌿 How to Cultivate Glimmers in Daily Life

Incorporating glimmers into your routine can significantly improve your emotional well-being. Here are some practical steps:


  1. Practice Mindfulness: Stay present and aware of your surroundings to notice subtle moments of joy.


  2. Keep a Glimmer Journal: Record daily glimmers to reinforce positive experiences of ease, wonder, or connection. Reflect on positive memories by revisiting cherished moments from the past to evoke feelings of safety and joy.


  3. Share Your Glimmers: Discussing these moments with others can strengthen connections and amplify their effects.


  4. Create Glimmer-Rich Environments and Routines: Sometimes they don't just appear, you have to invite them in! Surround yourself with elements that evoke positive feelings, such as photos, plants, a warm blanket, a candle, or make a playlist of calming music. Start your morning with a moment of warmth by stepping into the sun for 30 seconds.


If you’ve lived in survival mode for a long time, these moments can feel foreign or fleeting. But by intentionally seeking out, creating, and savoring these moments, you can train your nervous system to recognize and respond to cues of safety.


💬 Final Thoughts

Glimmers serve as gentle reminders that even on challenging days, moments of peace and connection are within reach. By cultivating awareness of these micro-moments, we can foster a more regulated and resilient nervous system, enhancing our overall well-being. So, take a moment today to pause and appreciate the glimmers around you—they're waiting to be noticed.


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